Consulting for Consumers

So I am not a consultant for Consumers Energy. Big surprise I know. But I think I could be. I could save them money. Lots of it. About three weeks ago Consumer men show up and say there is a leak in my gas line and can they please look at my meter. After assuring me that the leak was happening before my meter and that it wasn't costing me anything, they left. One week goes by, nothing, except the neighbors across the street complaining of gas smells. We couldn't smell it on our side. Another week and flags marking the water and phone lines go up in my yard, and two of the houses across the street. But no news. Another week. Nothing. This morning, the neighbor with the most flags left for Europe for three weeks. This afternoon, about one, three large trucks with equipment for cutting concrete show up along with their crews. They knock at the house across the street, the one with the most flags. Our gas meters are old and inside our houses so they need access to our basements to do their work. Of course, no one is home across the street and even though they need to work on my house too, they want all of us to be home at once. Now I should just call Consumers and offer my services because I can see a major flaw in the way they operate--they should just try scheduling their repairs using the ancient telephone. I wonder if they could just credit my energy bill for being so helpful?